Breaking: Lindsay Lohan Is Going To Jail

It’s with some schadenfreude and a little dose of pity that we bring you the news that Lindsay Lohan is heading to jail. The verdict just came in a few minutes ago after Judge Marsha Revel found LiLo in violation of her probation after Lohan skipped out on several alcohol education classes. The judge sentenced a weeping Lohan to 90 days in jail, followed by a 90 day inpatient rehab stint.

Earlier in the day, Lohan pleaded with the judge, telling her it was her work schedule that prevented her from attending the classes. She said “I wasn’t trying to get special treatment. I have to provide for myself. I have to work. Having said that, I did everything to balance my jobs and showing up. I’m not taking this as a joke. It’s my life. It’s my career…I take responsibility for my actions. I’ve tried to do the best I can. It’s been such a long haul, I don’t want you to think that I don’t respect you.”

Revel ordered Lindsay to attend classes every week without excuse, and yet Lindsay had nine absences and it was those absences (and not the fact that her SCRAM bracelet went off after her “employment obligation” to attend the MTV Movie Awards) that were the violation. In one of the most incompetent witness testimonies we’ve seen, the operator of the alcohol ed program, Cheryl Marshall, didn’t report the absences to the judge and claimed Lindsay was making excellent progress, despite missing nine weeks.

[Photo: Getty Images]