Katie Price Plumbing New Depths Of Disgustingness

Much as we might like to, it’s impossible to ignore the daily onslaught of stories about Katie Price‘s and Peter Andre‘s split in the UK. If there’s not pap shots of them going about their separate lives in the papers, there’s their magazine interviews and “exclusive” columns, or there’s Twitter. Soon they are sure to implant chips in our heads to make sure we don’t miss anything direct from their brain-grapes (© Tracy Jordan).

But sometimes the “blah blah blah” from their breakup is actually really disturbing. In order to stick a finger up at Pete, Katie is now hooked up in Malaga, Spain, with her new boyfriend, cage-fighter Alex Reid. And what should you do in order to get the most headlines? Why, “cavort” topless with him in the pool and then get him to give your bare booty a squeeze and dodgy fondle for the snappers when you’re lying naked for an outdoors massage. Yes, of course. Aw, the Andre children are going to love Mommy’s 2009 family album. [Photo: Splash News Online]