Reese Witherspoon Strips For Jake, Horrifies All

Reese Witherspoon is a fine actress and all, it’s just that she rates at Grandma-level on the Sexiness Scale that we oh-so harshly judge people by. So when we heard about her alleged striptease for boyfriend Jake Gyllenhaal while trying on lingerie in London, we shuddered to think of the granny-ness of the whole affair. Here’s the report from the other side of the Atlantic: “Jake watched — with a smile plastered across his face — as Reese slipped out of her clothes and wiggled into various bra and panty sets, including an itsy-bitsy pair of purple panties and a matching push-up bra.”

Had this been Jessica Alba or that brown-haired chick from Gossip Girl, or even Jake himself, the above description would be oh-so hot. But Reese perfected the mom-look long before she turned 30. It’s just not doin’ it for us. We hope Jake fared better. [Photo: WireImage]